10 hellish client responses that will make you giggle
Being a freelance designer can be a rocky road to go down. Outside of having the appropriate skills to get the job done; you have to take the idea of some stranger who may or may not know what they want, who probably has little to no design ability and turn it into a masterpiece that they have always dreamed of, for the lowest possible cost — with that cost being free of charge of course. Not to mention quite often you have to deal with not-so-smart individuals.
With dilemmas like that, designers come across clients that seem like they can be from hell. Clients from Hell takes anonymous contributions from freelance designers and compiles them into funny posts on their Clients from Hell Tumblr blog.
Here are a few of those posts that will surely make you smile.
I don’t think our system can cope with HTML, could you send the link to us in a different form?
The design’s great, but we have a racially diverse customer base. Please add more bright colors, colored people love colors.
CLIENT: Just wanted to tell you again we loved your work - the cupcake marketing plan is brilliant. We don’t know how to thank you.
ME: I’m so glad. No thanks necessary – I’ll settle for the project fee we agreed on.
CLIENT: Oh no, I’m afraid we don’t really have the money for that. Is there some other way we can repay you? Free cupcakes for life?
ME: I’m diabetic.
ME: Please measure the width of your window so that I know how wide to create your vinyl lettering.
CLIENT: I’m not sure what the exact dimensions are, but it is big.
ME: I’ll need more than that.
CLIENT: It’s made of glass.
CLIENT: I can’t pay you.
CLIENT: Because my client hasn’t paid me.
ME: I can see how that could be frustrating.
CLIENT: Do you think you can recreate this postcard?
ME: I can recreate it. Not exactly, but close.
CLIENT: Are you going to charge me? It’s for family.
ME: Not my family…
That looks gay. Make it more sexist, but be subtle.
CLIENT: I’d like a picture with greener grass.
ME: Does that mean your ad is in color this week?
CLIENT: Well, no.
CLIENT: Can’t everyone stand in the front for a while?
ME: Excuse me?
CLIENT: Yeah, I saw that photo effect in a Harry Potter movie once. Isn’t that photoshop?
ME: No. That’s magic.
CLIENT: I don’t mean to sound racist, but…
ME: But what?
CLIENT: But the site is too black.
ME: Like, literally too black?
CLIENT: Yes. The background is too black.
ME: That’s not racist. That has nothing to do with race.
CLIENT: Phew. I can never tell with you black people, what’s offensive and what’s not.
ME: I’m actually Lebanese. And, yeah, that one might be a bit racist.